Why I Didn't
by Hellen Lou
Summary: Why he didn't fight for her... why he let that other man win her heart. Fluff of sorts... well not really kinder sad in a way.


Why I didn't

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I watch, just like the many friends of ours as they glide across the dance floor. Beautiful in everything she did I look at the girl I love… I guess will always love and the man I allowed to lose her too.

You see it all started in our last year, at Hogwarts we all understood our relationship had changed and we knew how. I guess you should never fall in love with your best friend, advice I should have adhered to but it didn't matter because I loved her… I fell in love with Hermione.

And it was advice that neither of them took either… I always laughed at that, we never took any advice really.

The truth was I had my chance to make her mine… to see the love she gave to him every day but I was too much of a coward.

After the war everything changed… I knew, of course I knew that my best male friend loved Hermione but was too scared very much like my self to admit to it… there was other girls of course, but no one ever compared to Hermione.

The war however changed that… the deaths we all saw and some we had caused proved that life was too short. So he told her, he told her he loved her before I even had my chance… no my second chance too.

Her cinnamon eyes looked to me for the briefest of moments… I always wondered if she truly loved him, I thought she loved me but didn't want to break his heart because best friends don't do that. But I discovered she only looked to me like that because she wanted to make sure that it wasn't my heart broken by what she admitted… she loved him, she loved him with all her heart and she always would.

My heart did break, and I slipped into the night not uttering a word… weeks passed before I returned, I had… well I guess you can call it an epiphany. I could always love her but I couldn't always make her happy and she deserved that and so did he.

I could have fought for her… proved my love for her but the truth is I was tired and didn't want to fight… I didn't want to fight and lose. Lose her to him for good, and in a way to lose him too.

So I sit now on the sidelines watching the happy on their special day, my heart broken but my spirit soaring. The two most important people in my life were happy and I didn't stop that.

The dance finishes and I turn, for they kissed and as much as I love them both I couldn't see the intimacy and the life I was never going to be apart of. I feel someone sit beside me, I turn and find HIM beside me. He should be happy but now he looks worried, he looks at me and I offer a small smile but we both know things have changed and they will always stay that way.

My heart was broken and our friendship was fractured…it would remain that way.

"Why didn't you?" a question with so many meanings but I knew and so did he… there was one meaning to that question but a few dozen answers. All lies expect one, the one he deserves now.

"Because I couldn't make her happy as you can… I love her, I will always love her but you… you make her happy, and she deserves that" I see him look away and I scrawl at my self.

"And so do you" I admit but his frown deepens and he looks to the ground.

"she loves you too… she loves you in a way she can never love me… it hurts because I know today she didn't give all of her self to me" for a moment I felt the urge to rush to Hermione to gather her in my arms and tell her that I could make her whole. But Hermione received the worse of all this… she loved two men but she alone would make the choice of whose heart she broke.

She chose him over me and it still stung but she loved me in her own way.

"Why didn't you get in the way…why didn't you stop me?" I laugh and shake my head… maybe he didn't deserve if he had to question everything.

"Because in a way I always knew that I would never win… I will love her, and you can't stop that, but I love you too and if you allow me to love her I will never hurt what you two have" I ask it was my one request.

He thinks before nodding and silence descends, after a few minutes he stands and goes to walk back to Hermione.

I look down but I know he has more to say… if I'm willing to hear it is another matter.

"Ron" I look up at my name… I'm willing because he's willing too. I search those green eyes and it becomes painfully clear that this is the moment neither one of us can ever return from.

Me and him will never be the friends we once were… and I was ok with this because a small part of me will always hate him.

"I will never hurt her… I promise that"

"I know Harry… because you know that the moment you do I will kill you"

A warning, a threat… to anyone else it was friendly banter but to me and him, between myself and Harry Potter the boy who won it was a promise.

Harry nods and turns away back to his bride who stands smiling at him. They hug before Hermione whispers to him. Harry grins and nods before guiding his new wife to a table.

Why did I never tell Hermione I loved when I had the chance… why didn't I really fight?

The truth for once and all… Harry was never the coward I was… because he never thought that he would never lose if he fought me for her.

And Harry was not the coward I still am.

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not the best i know and i don't even know where the idea came from but i wrote it... please enjoy if you can and i'm sorry about my grammer. 


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